Powerful Times

There were a couple of questions on the last (informative and optimistic post), so here are my best answers.

Not to be nosy, but will they allow Tim to have a popsicle or a hard sucker. Those are sometimes what we use to give throat relief with an NG tube and they exercise your mouth :-)

No, not until he can swallow, which he cannot yet.

Have you all considered the thought that this has been an amazing way to bring all of us us 'out there' here in CA and around the world to share in a Concert of Prayer? It is one of the most immediate 'Ask for according to my will...' prayer vigils I have ever been part of...

We've had at least 9,200 different people check out the blog from at least 75 different countries and every US state and territory (see below for why both of these could be higher). Even as I write this post more comments that foreshadow this post are being posted.

TJ often is a guest speaker at churches around the country. The one he most often gives on missions is called Powerful Times. He gave it as recently as October 28th, and was scheduled to give it two days before he entered the ICU. Gaithersburg Community Church has a synopsis of it on their website (so I don't have to write one up!):

When we watch the news, there are so many bad things going on it’s a challenge to stay optimistic. It’s amazing to remember that God created all people and determined their time on earth. [TJ] encourages us in Acts 17:24-27 that there is no event in our world- good or bad- that does not first pass by the hands of God and that He does not use to build His church. (Emphasis added)

Having heard this sermon it occurred to me rather early on that this whole event could be part of a much larger going-on than we know of, or could ever imagine. I certainly didn't think that when I started this blog there were going to be thousands of people reading it, many every day, from all over the world.

From a young teenager speaking on behalf of his missionary father (TJ was 15 when he started public speaking) to the pasterhood, to his current position it has been his mission in life to glorify the Father. I'm positive that this would not be TJ's first choice to build the Church, it certainly isn't his family's first choice! But I am equally sure that he would submit to the Father's will for this reason.

If you are interested you can download the sermon courtesy of Gaithersburg Community Church here. The first five minutes are very telling considering TJ's current situation. It should play with just about any audio player. Sermon notes are here (PDF).

I am learning quite a bit about my father and mother from the outpouring of prayers, and offers to help in anyway possible. When my mom's mother passed we learned how many lives she had touched that we never knew about through the funeral. Similarly, but thankfully less morbidly, I am learning the same about my parents.

Technical Notes on Counting Blog Visits
Technically the hit counter (as it is called) tracks individual computers, i.e., it has no way of knowing whether one person is viewing the website from a computer or 10 (which I know is the case in my extended family). So the number of people that have visited this blog exceeds 9,200. There are also people that stay updated over the phone or through email that I know of. I don't think I'll ever know the exact number of people who are keeping track, but 15,000 wouldn't surprise me (anymore!) and 20,000 is possible.

Furthermore, for security reasons a lot of workers in sensitive countries go through an internet proxy which reroutes them through the US so their host country can't see where they are actually going. So the number of countries that have visited may also be undercounted.

Here is a non-specific example. Saudi Arabia filters their internet traffic so their citizens can't visit anywhere they please (as do other middle eastern countries and China). To get past this, or to visit a site you don't want Big Brother to know about you can go through an encrypted connection to a freer country (France, the US, Britain, whatever) so the only thing they see is that you are connecting to that country. From there, you are free to visit whatever you want. Therefore a visit from such a country would show up as a visit from France, the US, whatever. So the number of countries might exceed 75 because of this as well.

Slight Updates made 2:56 PM CST January 1st, 2008

Progress and Prayers, and ICU Confusion

TJ is continuing to improve generally but very slowly, with both praises and prayer requests today. The biggest news for the day is that TJ is ready to leave the ICU. As soon as a bed becomes available in a special care unit (between ICU and a regular unit), he will be moving. As the doc was relating this news, he blanked on Mary Ann’s name, and Tim was able to croak out “Mary Ann” to correct him! That made Mary Ann’s morning.

Another highlight of TJ’s morning was spending some time looking at pictures on his computer that he had taken in Lebanon. The fun part was having the Lebanese nursing assistant present to talk about the pictures, and TJ was able to interact non-verbally with her, recognizing people and places from his travels.

TJ’s morning also involved both OT and speech therapy, and those left him exhausted. That leads us to our biggest prayer requests for today:

• TJ’s tongue is weak, which makes swallowing nearly impossible. He needs to be able to swallow before his feeding tube can be removed (the NG tube).
• He is still very weak overall. The smallest efforts leave him wiped. Gaining strength will be essential to his recovery.

It is very possible that TJ will improve more rapidly once he is out of ICU, as Jon explains below:

ICU Confusion
There is actually a fairly wide spread medical condition for people coming to after being under in the ICU called ICU psychosis. First, I need to make this very clear, TJ is not exhibiting signs of psychosis. He is not going mad. However, some quick reading on the subject may help explain why TJ's mental status isn't progressing as quickly as we had hoped.

Dehydration, low blood oxygen levels (sats), infections, constant light in the room, and constant stimulation (IVs beeping, people talking outside, nurses and PCAs checking on the patient every hour -- or less) all contribute. In TJ's case he has had varying levels of all of these.

He probably was slightly dehydrated for a time in order to get the fluid out of his lungs, his sats have never been bad, but they have been lower than most healthy people. (Healthy is 97, he has been sitting anywhere between 90 - 97 depending on the day.) There is always a light on in the room, and even if there wasn't, there isn't a way to shut the light out from outside the room (the room will become dim at night, but not dark).

Most of the time he's been in the ICU (27 days) he's been checked on every 30-60 minutes, and the first two nights I spent there, IVs and the ventilator were constantly beeping. It was like three cell phones going off at once every two seconds.

Finally, he obviously had a pretty bad infection.

What this all adds up to is some significant confusion from organic and multiple environmental factors. Simply moving TJ out of the ICU may clear much of this up, we'll see. But we thought it was worth explaining this. I have no doubt that this adds to his slow mental recovery, I just don't know how much.

Sources: New York Times, http://query.nytimes.com/gst/fullpage.html?res=9A0CE3DB113BF93BA35751C1A96E958260&sec=&spon=&pagewanted=1

MedicineNet, http://www.medicinenet.com/icu_psychosis/article.htm

Visitor Policy

We have been getting some queries about seeing TJ now that he is getting better. The answer for almost everyone is a stronger "no" than before. If you want to stop by and see a family member that is different, but TJ is awake enough to simply become more tired out and anxious by visitors.

We are sorry for all of the close friends we have that would like to see him, but he simply is not in a position to do so. (There is some evidence that too much stimulation can slow down progress when coming out of a coma.)

Genesis of a Blog

We'll try to post a real update soon, in the meantime I thought I'd put this up.

I've had many comments regarding the blog, so I thought I would share how it came about.

The day after TJ entered the hospital I realized that there would be hundreds of people simply within his organization that would want to know what was going on. Because I already had a Blogger account I knew it would take about three minutes to set up a new one. In fact, the longest parts were coming up with a name and the look for it.

The basic idea was to provide a way to communicate with lots of people (TJ's organization and family) without sending out six to twelve emails a day. The idea of the blog was basically a whim - minimal energy to try.

I wasn't sure whether it would be helpful or not, so the next day (Thursday) I threw up a hit counter to figure out whether people were visiting or not. Within 24 hours there were over 500 people visiting it -- a pretty strong sign that it was worth keeping up.

Since that day, we have yet to have dip below 1,000 (in fact, I think 1,500) hits in a day. None of us had an idea of what was to come. Even on Christmas we had 1,600 hits (somebody looking at the page), I was sure it would dip down to 500 give or take that day.

As of right now we have had 9,200 different people visit the blog, and this does not include situations where couples or families have one computer and visit it at once. After considering the "family factor" we might be above 15,000 different people. Moreover, we have had people visiting from 75 countries, I suspect more for countries that go through the U.S. for security reasons.

I don't know why what is happening is happening, or what 'higher' purpose this blogs serves, but it's difficult to believe that there isn't a reason we can't see yet. That I can't see yet.

Many people have commented that the blog is a blessing to them in some way or another. Honestly, the number of people and the huge number of comments are an enormous blessing to us, as we know how many people petition the LORD to support us through prayer. Blogging has become our privilege.

As an econ major numbers make sense to me, and they say that more is going on than we can realize. And that means a lot when you walk in to see your dad or husband barely able to respond to the simplest of questions.

My dad's life life mission had been to glorify God and to build the church. I am sure we would not have chosen this path, but if this serves to build the church and glorify the Father, we'll take it. We'll argue, we might be upset (and that is ok), but we'll take it if it accomplishes God's will.

So to return to the topic, the blog was a whim, and has blessed us enormously. To all those who tell us it has been a blessing to them, I am glad. The truth is, I don't think any of us really know why (in a higher sense) the blog was started.

P.S. The highest number of hits we had was on December 13th, 5,400, I am trying to figure out why it spiked that day. Any ideas?

P.P.S. To Jon and Mandy who thought I might be being facetious, I'm not. That wasn't the only day bad things were happening to TJ. 12/12, 2,600 hits, 12/13, 5,400, 12/14, 4,500, 12/15, 3,100