Wonderful Christmas to All!

From T.J.’s heart to yours

I have done a lot of thinking this Christmas season knowing that one year ago I was in a long struggle between life and death. This year I have read and re-read the blog entries that my family posted and which so many responded to. I cannot read it without tears streaming down my cheeks and those of you who know me know that is not the normal TJ.

It is a gift to be at the end of oneself when only God has the power to heal. It is a gift to be the recipient of the thousands of those who prayed. It is a gift to know that a spiritual battle was waged and that God defeated the enemy. It is a gift to know that every day I have post January 14, 2008 is an undeserved gift from God. It is a gift to be a walking testimony to His goodness, mercy and grace. It is a gift to be able to look outside and see the beautiful snow that I missed last December. It is a gift to look forward to Christmas day with my family – no gifts are needed this year – being here together is the greatest gift I could have.

The past year has been a gift. To know my heart has been healed, to continue to recover my strength, to spend more time with Mary Ann. In addition God has graciously allowed me to publish my second book, Leading from The Sandbox and to complete a third, The Intentional Life, which will be published by NavPress in October 2009. One of the dedications for my third book is to each of you who so faithfully prayed for us.

Suffering is not something we ask for but it is an amazing gift. It focuses the heart and life like nothing else can. It clarifies what is important. It allows us to share in the fellowship of His sufferings and to understand our savior better. It sensitizes to the sufferings and hardships of others. I count the past year with all of its challenges as the greatest gift of my life along with Mary Ann, Jon, Steven and my relationship with God. I would not trade it for anything!

I do not understand why the physical and spiritual battle was waged but I do not need to know. What I know is that God is good all the time – and that would have been true had I not survived, that His mercy is amazing and that He is utterly sovereign. I can trust Him with each situation, every challenge, all disappointments and all the turns in the road of life. If I have just one more day to live, I will be forever thankful. He is the alpha and omega of our lives, the beginning and the end.

If you come to this blog from time to time it is most likely because you were one of the thousands who upheld my family and prayed for my healing when I could do neither. I thank you from the bottom of my heart. God used your petitions to strengthen my family over 42 long days, to heal my body and bring me back from the brink. I am forever grateful to you and one day will be able to thank and rejoice with each one on the other side of eternity. It will be a big reunion as we celebrate God’s goodness.

I start to travel internationally again on December 26. I am not as strong as I used to be – perhaps it will come back in time, I don’t know. But even if there is a new normal it will daily remind me of God’s grace and goodness. There remain some health challenges but given what God has already done, I can and do trust him for the future.

As I celebrate Christmas this year I do so with thanksgiving for you and your prayers. May He give you great joy as He has given us.

T.J.

Boma

When TJ was in the hospital last year I would get a picture in my head when I prayed for him. It was a man (I assumed to be TJ) sitting on the ground by a large bright fire. He was sitting with his right leg out straight and his left knee bent sort of leaning back on his left arm. His right arm was stretched out toward the fire with a stick in his hand. He was in an oval shaped shelter that I described as a hedgerow because it was the only thing I had seen that could describe it. It was a thick fence made of thorny sticks and seemed impenetrable so TJ was sitting there relaxed, yet alert and waiting.

A couple weeks ago my brother Will got back from a trip to Tanzania where he had the opportunity to visit a community in a very remote area accessible only by small plane. As he described the enclosure around the village, I realized that what I had seen when I prayed for TJ was really a Boma- as I understand it, a word used to describe the fence around a village and the homes in the village.
Here is an article that describes a boma: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Boma_(enclosure)

I was really excited when I found the articles on bomas because it really fits the sense of safety I felt the picture I was seeing portrayed (albeit TJ was in a very small boma). We are supposed to go to Tanzania in March and I really hope we get to see a boma!

A year later we are still learning through the experience. It's not always comfortable -- there are many days when if would be nice to finally leave it behind -- but makes me hopefully eager at the same time for what else is in store for us due to that one, long, painful month.

Love and appreciate you all!
MA